Prison Break Recap: Chicago

Title: “Chicago”
Original Airdate: February 5, 2007
GMMR Recapper: Michelle

Once again, this show provides some of the most quotable lines on television. Plus, I’m going through the five stages of grief with Kellerman (even though he’s not dying), and we get some hot and heavy locomotive action with Michael and Sara. Yep, this episode was a winner.

In Evansville, Indiana, Kellerman, Linc and Michael meet up with Sara. Michael and Sara exchange a long, lingering (but non-sexual) hug. Sara and Kellerman meet up for the first time since their unfortunate drowning-you-in-the-tub incident. Apparently at some point Sara tells Michael about this whole ordeal, since Michael slams Kellerman against the wall in defense of his True Love (yep – and it’s capitalized, too). Kellerman reminds Michael, though, that they need Kellerman to solve the mystery of the “key” Sara found on her dead dad’s body, and the quartet is off. Apparently the key is to a humidor at a private cigar club in Chicago, which is, not coincidentally, where the President is set to make an appearance. The comparisons to “The Wizard of Oz” here are freaky and inevitable– they started with two on a quest, then three, now four, and they’re off to meet The Wizard – aka President Reynolds – to have their wishes fulfilled, and their journey is filled with mystery and trepidation…you can fill in the rest. I’m waiting for the creepy flying monkeys to make an appearance anytime now.

And speaking of creepy monkeys, we see apparent domestic bliss (of “The Twilight Zone” variety) in the Hollander household as T-Bag and Susan wake up together in the same bed. Turns out he has her tied up, which explains why she’s even there, but spooning is spooning, and were it not for the white cord keeping her on the bed (which could be interpreted in lots of different ways, anyway, depending on how you watch the show), you’d think you were watching a sit-com. Until T-Bag says something that I’m pretty sure not many other dads in the world say upon waking: “I’ll go unlock the kids and go make us all breakfast.” Susan explains that their situation can’t last, as the kids are expected at school, she’ll be missed at work, and the Welcome Wagon lady will visit later, and if Susan doesn’t answer the door, people will wonder what’s up. She begs her “teddy bear” to leave and save himself, but he is apparently hell-bent on making them a “family,” so he goes to unlock the kids. With a gun in his pants. Again, no metaphor there. Later, we see him making brunch for the Welcome Wagon lady and his new “family.” Turns out T-Bag has quite a Martha Stewart gene in him, and he serves pumpkin cinnamon bread with fresh whipped cream and strawberries. This little detail just adds to the overwhelming creepiness of the whole situation, as this plastic family sits at the table and watches as the unsuspecting Welcome Wagon lady is charmed by T-Bag. They are helpless. Upon her leaving, T-Bag announces that the family MUST MOVE to avoid detection. Pan to shot of the Bagwell-Hollander household trucking down the road in a jam-packed vehicle, jaunty music playing in the background. This is no Griswold family vacation, obviously. Where are they going and, more importantly, what fate awaits them? I don’t even want to consider it.

On the Haywire front, it appears that our favorite Crazy Man really did kill that girl’s abusive dad last week. We see Haywire by his raft, frantically mumbling about making it to Holland. Mahone has been given orders to kill Haywire, but Mahone’s second-in-command at the FBI won’t follow Mahone’s commands anymore; he says he only follows orders through headquarters now. They’re onto Mahone, who quickly goes to his plan B, and by “B” I mean Bellick. He visits Bellick at Fox River (where he is still living in gen. pop., despite Mahone’s previous promises) and tells him he can get him out if Bellick, who apparently has a Scooby sense regarding how to find the convicts (he has, remember, tracked down T-Bag before), will find the cons now. True to his word, Mahone negotiates the fastest release from prison that I’ve ever seen, and before we know it Bellick is out of Fox River, driving toward Haywire and practicing his “I’m with the FBI” introduction he plans to use.

The Fab Four (Linc, Kellerman, Sara and Michael) hitch a train to Chicago when Kellerman tells the train dude that he’s transporting a dangerous felon (Michael) and that they’ll need a car to themselves. The train dude buys this story remarkably easily, and soon the four warriors are in their own car on their way to the humidor in Chicago. Shortly after leaving the train station, the four weary passengers rest, and Sara asks Michael if she can get some water. As soon as he leaves to fetch the agua for his beloved, Kellerman tells Sara that what happened with him trying to kill her wasn’t personal…”war never is.” But Sara doesn’t really buy it, and SHE TRIES TO KILL KELLERMAN BY STRANGLING HIM. Turns out she’s still pissed about the bathtub-electrocution thing. Of course, Linc stops her, Michael walks in, Kellerman explains away the incident to the concerned train due in the next car (“You guys continue to do bong hits or whatever it is you do back there”), and off they go. Kellerman has been accepting calls from President Reynolds, though, and although we’re not sure where his allegiance lies, it seems as though this incident may have pushed him closer to turning on Michael and Lincoln. Is he going to deliver them to the authorities? Never trust a con.

Obligatory C-Note mention (I don’t dislike him, but I’m not very fascinated with this storyline, either, so I’ll keep it short): He and his despondent (she misses her mom) and sick (she needs her meds) daughter are having a meal in a diner when it’s held up at gunpoint. C-Note talks down the robber and convinces the guy not to harm the other diner patrons and to let him go, as he confesses that he’s an escaped con. But when the gunman looks like he’s going to take one of the women captive and possibly hurt her, noble C-Note intervenes, saves her, breaks the guy’s arm (in a really gruesome way, giving new meaning to the term “bend you over the table”), and earns the respect and loyalty of everyone in the diner, in spite of his convict status. When the police arrive and C-Note is nowhere to be found, another diner patron takes responsibility for breaking the guy’s arm, and the woman who was almost held hostage lets C-Note escape through a different door, as she helps him elude the police once again. Charmed life.

Back on the train, Michael and Sara are sitting together in the bathroom (yup). He tells her that he’s getting through this on sheer faith: “I choose to have faith, because without that, I have nothing.” She tells him she’s not using drugs (even though she looks pretty strung out to me…I guess that amount of stress will do that), and that in the absence of her usual coping mechanism of choice, she has only two things getting her through this: wanting to find out who killed her dad, and the fact that she has fallen in love with Michael. They kiss. A lot. It’s sweet, and looks like it may be leading to bigger things, but just then, they realize that the local police have set up a roadblock (damn roadblock! This one is both literal AND metaphorical). They force the conductor to run the roadblock, and then it appears that the Fab Four jump from the train. But wait! Turns out they didn’t jump after all. They made four other people on the train jump out so it looked like they jumped. The Fab Four make it all the way to Chicago. Kellerman realizes that he has not been talking to the President after all (think of “The Terminator” when Arnold can mimic anyone’s voice on the phone and it’s creepy and surreal…that’s what’s going on here, but with the help of computer software being manned by Mr. Kim, who just wants to trap Kellerman. Turns out Kellerman is not returning to the dark side after all. I really have been through the stages of grief with this guy: denial (“Oh my God, is he really a good guy?”), anger (“Oh, no! He’s just pretending to be gay to get that information from Sara!”), bargaining (“Please don’t let him go back to the dark side, and I promise I’ll watch this show forever”), depression (“I can’t believe he’s going to turn in Michael and Linc”) and acceptance (“He’s not gonna turn them in! He’s a good guy!”). Don’t let me down now, Kellerman.

Meanwhile, Bellick has led Mahone to Haywire, who is sitting on top of a grain elevator with a whole audience of people watching from below, wondering what will happen. Mahone is pissed about this, since he obviously can’t shoot Haywire with a bunch of people watching him, but he still needs Haywire to be dead. So he climbs up the tower and very slowly and very cunningly…convinces Haywire to jump to his death. It’s fascinating and sad. He “befriends” Haywire, tells him he doesn’t have to go back to prison but that he can’t go to Holland, either, and that there’s another way out. Without ever actually saying it, he leads Haywire to believe that the only way out of this mess is death. And our beloved Crazy Guy is gone for good. Another tick mark in Mahone’s “dead” column.

In Chicago, Sara and Michael head into the cigar shop to open the humidor with the key. On their way in, Michael stops Sara and very clumsily lets her know his feelings for her. He reminds her of what just happened on the train and of what she said…and he says, “Me, too.” I am a tad disappointed by this, since Michael is one of the most intelligent and articulate men on television, convict or not, and I’m hoping he can come up with something a little better than, “Me, too,” because if you can’t count on Michael Scofiled to be articulate when expressing his emotions, then what hope is there for the millions of average (and below-average) men in this world? I understand, though, that he’s pressed for time and under stress, so I’ll let it slide. Plus, his declaration is good enough for Sara, who just says, confidently, “I know” before they head into the cigar shop. Finally: a tv pairing with no hidden agenda, no silly misunderstandings, and no manufacturered obstacles. How refreshing. And from a prison drama, no less.

Michelle is the frazzled mother of two very young kids. In lieu of taking a shower every day, she writes TV recaps for GMMR to keep the remaining shred of her sanity intact. This also helps her justify her insanely intense TV-watching habit, which was spawned in her early childhood because she was allowed to watch an unlimited number of”Sesame Street” episodes when she herself was a preschooler.