The Fire Guy is My Only Friend

At the urging of some friends, I started a MySpace.com account for this website. Supposedly MySpace is all the rage with kids these days, and if you don’t have an account, well…you just aren’t cool, hip or fresh. From what I hear, MySpace is the place to connect online with your friends and friends of your friends. Problem is, I checked my MySpace account, and I only have one friend.

So who is my lone friend? Well, his name is BJ Novak. He plays Ryan “the Fire Guy” Howard, the intern on The Office. I’m not sure how I should feel about BJ being my only friend. I’m close to 30 and I have only one friend..so that’s kind of sad. But on the other hand, my one friend is BJ Novak, who is an actor and a writer and is on the verge of blowing up in H-town, so that’s kind of cool, right? Would I be happier if I had 8 friends, but they were all normal, boring people? Isn’t one actor-friend equivalent to at least 50 normal friends? I mean BJ is friends with a lot of cool people like Ashton Kutcher, Jenna Fischer, and John Krasinski. So if being friends with BJ means that I might be able to meet his friends, then having only one friend is fine by me.

Oh the fun I could have chillin’ with BJ and his “office-mates” after work. John Krasinski & I could kick it old school Boston style (while I look adoringly into his eyes).

And just think of the people I’ll get to meet through BJ’s other friends. Kutch alone could hook me up with a lot of fun people…there’s Demi, Bruce, and Fez. And we all know that Fez has banged many a celebutant, so hanging with him means hanging with Ashlee Simpson, Mandy Moore and Lindsay Lohan. Since Lindsay and I will be friends, she could introduce me to Princess Vapid, Stavros, Kimberly Stewart and her fiance Talan. Next thing you know I could parlay my new found friendship with Talan to spend some QT with all of the Laguna Bitches. Kristin Cavs and I can dish about men, while watching Alex M’s band play at a club. And you know who else would be there? Jason…oh J-Wahl…I could sleep with Jason and write all about it, right here on this very blog. And really, is there anything more important in life than figuring out the enigma that is Jason from Laguna Beach? Yeah, didn’t think so.

The way I see it, if you become friends with me, you can sleep with Jason too. It’s just that easy!!

So thank you BJ Novak for being my only friend. We are in for some good times brotha!!!

Big News…I know have 2 friends…Jenna Fischer, who plays Pam on The Office, is now my friend too. Woo hoo!!! This is a good day people.