Gilmore Girls Recap: “Santa’s Secret Stuff”

 

Title: “Santa’s Secret Stuff”
Original Airdate: January 22,2007

HAPPY NEW YEAR! I hope you enjoyed your seven week hiatus from Gilmore Girls, because its back, and hopefully better then ever. When we left off Chris and Lorelai had some trouble in paradise due to Chris’s insecurities in the relationship. This leads to Hayden and Danes 2006, when our boys finally got to throw some punches at each other. Meanwhile Rory and Marty’s deception to Lucy came out thanks to Logan and Luke hired a lawyer to fight Anna for rights to April. Did you miss me? Yeah, me too.

Lorelai is up in her bedroom pacing and looking out the window, more specifically at her driveway. She doesn’t have to wait long however because Rory’s car pulls in. Lorelai races through the house to get to her daughter with Christopher and Gigi close on her tail. I completely forgot about Gigi, but then again I always do, and I’m pretty sure so do the writers. YAY! Rory is home! YAY! She was in England! BOO! Why don’t I get to feast my eyes on Logan? Rory notices that the Christmas lights aren’t up, and it turns out they saved Christmas for her return. No presents. No tree. Nada. Poor Gigi. Rory apologizes for any celebrating she may have done overseas and they decided to get down the Christmas season…six days late.

The family enters the house with Christmas trees, the classic Charlie Brown variety, much to Chris’s chagrin. They girls start going through their decorations and catching up. Rory shares that she forgave Logan for the whole “telling Lucy that I knew her boyfriend even though we pretended to not know each other” debacle, since he apologized a million times and admitted he’d been jealous. She’s left a couple messages for Lucy but hasn’t heard back, wishing she’d been truthful with her friend from the start. Chris saunters in, finds a piece of mistletoe and wants to hang it in the doorway. No sir, it’s tradition to attach it to the ceiling fan in the Gilmore household, and they hold their tradition’s dear to their hearts. They hang their stockings on the banister, eat red and green M&M’s in their cereal, get peppermint coffee at Westins and bake cookies. Actually they decorate cookies that they bought, but all in all sounds like fun. Christopher thinks it sounds great but he thought “they” could start some traditions, so he bought them all new stockings. Giant, shiny, monogrammed stockings. Being an oblivious male he starts hanging them up and suggesting they all go caroling not noticing how unimpressed Rory and Lor are. And then he starts to sing and trust me when I say describing it as bad would be a compliment.

We’re at the Inn and Mr Danes has just walked it. Sigh. He’s there to see Lorelai and asks if they can talk. They sit and Luke explains the whole Anna/April situation and the fact that he has to go to court so he can see his daughter. Lor thinks it’s great he’d doing it, but Luke explains he “can’t not do it”. Anyway he needs a character reference, to which he got Liz to do originally but the lawyer felt her letter was weird, so would she do it? Lor says yes right away and Luke sighs with relief, giving her his lawyer’s address and thanking her. Luke shakes her hand and heads out, and poor Lor looks not only stunned but also hurt as he walks away. What did you expect Lor? A bear hug? Seriously.

It’s the next day and Lor is sitting at the Inn, trying to write. Giving up she heads to the kitchen for coffee and some chitchat with her best friend forever. Lorelai is feeling the pressure, because this letter could save Luke and April’s relationship. Sookie, doing what I would do, also points out how hard it must be due to her past with him and her feelings for him. Lor insists its just about making it a good letter to help him out, and with that heads back to writing. Actually we get a montage of Lorelai doing everything but writing, like eating candy, juggling, pacing, crumbling up paper, and finally throwing her pen in frustration.

Lane’s at the diner and girl is HUGE. I know she’s carrying twins but how can she even walk? Some customers inquire as to whether or not she is carrying two babies, and she goes off on them. Maybe she’s overweight and carries all of it in her stomach! Hadn’t you thought about that? They apologize but she proclaims she is pregnant and then rants at some other customers for leaving her such a big tip. Luke lets it slide because at that moment April walks in. Sorry to repeat myself but YAY! Daddy Luke is happy to see her but not happy that she lied to her mother about where she is. April begs to stay and Luke gives in, taking the Christmas present April brought him and taking his daughter upstairs for tuna sandwiches. April and Luke missing each other so much is too adorable and makes my ovaries yearn for him. Don’t judge.

The Gilmore residence is looking fine in all its festive glory, with Gigi, Rory and Lor making popcorn and cranberry garlands. Lor laments her inability to write Luke’s letter and how it always ends up sounding shmoopy. Rory suggests just putting pen to paper and letting it flow naturally. Turns out Lor tried that but her mind is actually a dark and scary place, and she wrote things like “Monkey. Monkey. Underpants. “ Yeah, that sounds like her mind. Rory becomes inspired and decides to write a letter to Lucy, explaining how sorry she is for everything. Lor tries to pawn the letter off to Rory, but her daughter thinks it’s important that her mother do this. Chris comes home and Lor quickly changes to subject, and Rory picks it up on that right away.

Lane’s waddling down the street and comes home to her husband and mother bonding over vegetables. They’ve bought her good food and new vitamins, worrying and fretting over her. Zack even wants to know how much she has urinated that day. Once her mother leaves the room, Lane starts stuffing chocolate in her mouth. That is until she realizes they put her drum set in the closet to make room for the new crib they bought. Zack doesn’t see what the big deal is, since they haven’t had practice in months and he’s not sure Lane could even play in her condition. Oh she can play all right and she wants to have a band practice right now.

Lorelai and Rory are at Westins, upset about their coffee situation. Turns out they stop serving peppermint coffee the day after Christmas, so they are stuck with normal coffee and candy canes. Lor is still trying to write the letter but cannot focus. Therefore she says they should go shopping to buck up her spirits. Rory agrees but before they go she wants to know why her Mom is lying to Chris about the letter. Lor tries that whole “I’m not lying, I’m just not saying anything” storyline, but Rory says honesty is always the best policy. Finally Lor explains Chris’s feelings about Luke and the wedding party debacle, she just wants to be sensitive to Chris when it comes to her ex-fiancée. She promises everything will be fine. Rory gives in but points out that she’s pretty adult now, so her Mom doesn’t have to pretend that everything is okay, especially if its not.

At Luke’s apartment he’s hanging up a mask April made him in art class, and she updates him about her swim team and school. Luke starts talking about New Mexico, hoping to get her excited about it, but it just puts her in a bad mood. To cheer her up he gives her a Christmas present, a rock polisher she wanted. She’s happy but her grandmother already got her one, but she’ll keep both. With that they decide to put it the machine together.

Lor’s on her bed, trying to write again, when Chris walks in. She hides the pad under the bed and he notices but she pretends that it’s a present. They kid around, she kicks him out of the room, grabs her pad of paper and yells to Rory that its time to go shopping.

Lane is trying to talk music to Brian but he’s just staring at her stomach. Zack distracts him by showing off his new mandolin, but somehow that just becomes a demonstration of different ways to hold a baby. I am the aunt of 6 (seven if you included my b.f.f.’s little girl) and I didn’t even know all those, I am impressed Zack. Gil shows up with his youngest kid Macon, since his babysitter bailed out. His kid’s name is Macon? That doesn’t sound very rock’n roll to me, and it rhymes with bacon for goodness sakes. Lane wants to get started but Gil notices that they bought the same breast pump his wife used. Brian is fascinated by the idea of breast-feeding (probably just breasts in general) and everyone is psyched to be talking all things baby. Everyone but Lane that is.

Mom and daughter are shopping and it looks like they’ve bought everyone’s presents. Lor wants to get something special for Chris but doesn’t know what he would want. How about a big vault so he could swim around in his money like Scrooge McDuck used to? I mean what else could a millionaire want. They see a telescope in a shop window so they head in to check it out. Rory spots Luke and April, so Lor reluctantly heads over. Luke asks how its going which causes her to get all flustered thinking he’s asking about the letter, which he wasn’t. Father and daughter are there to exchange the rock polisher for a new microscope, and April proclaims her father a great gift giver. Luke finds that hard to believe as him and Rory reminisce about how one year he got her monogrammed towels and continuously bought her things with unicorns on it. He thought she liked them and she never said anything because it was always so nice he bought her stuff and that he never forgot her birthday. From the adoring look on Lor’s face I think she just realized what she’s going to write in her letter. Finally Luke says he has to get April home and they head out. Okay this was by far the best scene of the night, because you could see that these four work as a family and how Luke has always been there for Rory, unlike a certain someone who shall remain nameless. But for the heck of it lets call him CHRISTOPHER.

The parents to be have just finished grocery shopping and Zach points out to Lane that her mother doesn’t think she should be eating too many sweets. Of course Lane is sick of her mother, of people treating her like an incubator, of telling her what to do and most of all she doesn’t want everything to change. Her hubby points out that things are going to change because they are going to have babies, two human beings to look after. Lane can’t believe she had such a small amount of time to be her own person and now its all going to go away again. Zack promises that she will still be able to be herself, go out and play, and rock. That’s the great thing about Mama Lane; with her help they can make those things happen. Zach suggests Mama just hang out with them on the weekend and go home during the week. This calms Lane down and they happily walk home.

Luke brings April back to the diner and she immediately starts coming up with another plan for them to meet, which involved a chess club and birdcalls. I didn’t get it either. Luke tells her that they can’t keep lying to Anna and that they’ll negotiate a way to both be her parents. April hopes he got a good lawyer because her mother hired a shark. I think I’m starting to get a little scared about this.. Still Luke tells her not to worry, let the parents figure it out but because of the court case they need to be honest. April wants Luke to keep the microscope at his place because she’ll be back, soon. Dad and daughter hug, and I get misty eyed. If there is any justice in the world Luke will get custody of his daughter, and I will wake up tomorrow with hair like Rory’s.

Lorelai is typing up a letter, sticks it in an envelope and seals it up. She heads downstairs where Chris, Rory and Gigi are decorating store bought cookies. She tells them she’s just heading out for a second and then walks outside to a mailbox. With a heavy heart she mails the letter and the snow starts to fall. Looks like she might have finally realized what we all know, that she let a good man go when she left Luke. And might I add it’s about freaking time!

Next Week: Chris finds a copy of Lorelai’s letter and wants to know if she still loves Luke. Well Lor, do you? Yeah I thought so.

Being born and raised amongst the igloos of Canada shaped Whirl’s love of hockey, beer and the warmth of the television screen. Though she refuses to wear spandex she has sworn to use her powers of sarcasm for the greater good of man kind, and disguises herself daily as a mild mannered office clerk. Oh yeah, and she’s not too bad at Trivial Pursuit. Seriously. Seriously.