30 ROCK: St. Valentine's Day - Give Me My Remote : Give Me My Remote

30 ROCK: St. Valentine’s Day

February 13, 2009 by  

It’s a little tough to tell Valentine’s Day apart from April Fool’s Day on 30 ROCK, huh? So it’s only natural that Liz would forget Saturday is Vday, since what single person wants to be reminded of that? Only the crazies. And that Jack would be stuck accompanying Elisa to church for “the feast of the martyrdom of St. Valentine” instead of stuffing them both full of a horrible-sounding $1,000 dessert at the equally horrible-sounding Plunder. And that Kenneth would end up playing a mute Christian to Tracy’s hillbilly Cyrano on a “Valentine’s dately-do” with a pretty blind girl, only to lose her to his own face in the end. So much love! So many fools!

Our own Liz Lemon comes out lucky in love for once, although I’m not sure a first date in which you accidentally expose both a boob and yourself on the can would be considered all that lucky anywhere but in Lemonland. Still, everything unfolds pretty much as you would expect, as a pyromaniac wino daughter, an unfortunate pot of stew, and a batch of burning brownies take Liz and Drew all the way to Date 20 in a single night (with a sad detour to Liz’s Date Never, toilet-wise). And this is before she gets sucked into tagging along to Drew’s mother’s deathbed, where she learns that his mother is actually his grandmother and his sister is actually his mother. Which actually makes Drew sound a lot like Kenneth. But nobody’s perfect, and at least he’s not a serial killer. Right?

Meanwhile, Jack’s nod to Elisa’s religious devotion has him blithely confessing to all sorts of executive-level shenanigans (“I may have sodomized our former vice president while under the influence of some weapons-grade narcotics”) and winds up driving the priest right out of the booth to call for backup. Which shames him not in the least, nor does it stop him from propositioning his lady friend right in front of “the patron saint of judgmental statues.” I’m still bored by this relationship, but anything that has Jack facing off against God on His own turf and then seeking salvation in a McFlurry is worthy of sincere applause. (And certainly a broken heart has driven him to poor dietary choices before, as in Season One’s phenomenal “Up All Night,” but at least this time it didn’t end with a hooker.)

My favorite, though, was Tracy’s wooing of Blind Jennifer for poor lovestruck Kenneth, which played sweetly off their weird mentor/protégé bond and gave Tracy the chance to release his inner Kenneth: “Would you like to go out with me tomorrow night? Yes indeedy corncobs?” I also like that he brings his entourage along for the ride, with Grizz and Dotcom serving up dinner on the TGS soundstage, and even Jenna pitching in with an incoherent Michael McDonald impression. But alas, when Kenneth finally fesses up (“you’re the sweetest, prettiest, blindest girl I’ve ever met”), his dreams are quickly dashed, and apparently by his lack of a solid chin. Sigh. Fare thee well, Miss Magoo.


  • Liz: “Morning, Dr. Baird.”
  • Drew: “Morning, Regular Person Lemon.”
  • Elisa: “Please, Jack, don’t tell me you’re one of those convenient Catholics that only goes to church every Sunday.”
  • Jack: “Elisa is deeply religious.”
  • Liz: “If I had those knockers, I’d be thanking God, too.”
  • Tracy, answering Kenneth’s page phone: “NBC, blah blah blah, thank you.”
  • Jennifer: “My instincts have never let me down! Except for looking at that eclipse.”
  • Jack’s church-side phone call to Jonathan, recited to the tune of the Lord’s Prayer: “Our Jonathan, who art in the office, hallowed be my reservation. If you are able, hold my table, at Plunder, as we will not be there by seven. Have them delay our heavenly dessert, and forgive us our lateness, as we forgive those who cause lateness against us.”
  • Three gold stars for Liz’s Mandy Patinkin shout-out, from me and all my theater geek friends.
  • Elisa: “I’m so mad at you that I’m yelling at you in Spanish like Ricky Ricardo!”

Kari is a 30 ROCK fanatic and will be taking it out on you, her new imaginary friends.


13 Responses to “30 ROCK: St. Valentine’s Day”

  1. c on February 13th, 2009 12:47 pm

    was the blind girl played by claire danes? it was certainly someone who looked a lot like her!

  2. kari on February 13th, 2009 1:44 pm

    Nope; credits say Maria Thayer.

  3. Becky on February 13th, 2009 4:38 pm

    I thought she couldn’t date him becasue she felt his face and then her face and I thought they were related somehow. Was that just me or am I totally insane?

  4. kari on February 13th, 2009 4:51 pm

    No idea; my feeling was she just didn’t like his face, but I guess it’s possible.

  5. MannieAnnie on February 13th, 2009 4:53 pm

    That’s what my first thought was Becky!

  6. CFO (not myinitials) on February 13th, 2009 6:03 pm

    I missed part. Did Liz tell the doctor about his sister/mom? Or did she set herself up for later embarrassment by keeping it quiet?

  7. kari on February 13th, 2009 6:30 pm

    @ Becky & MannieAnnie — I see where you’re coming from. I thought otherwise, just because she tells Tracy she’s pretty sure she’s hot, after she feels her own face.

    @CFO (love your Michael Scott-ness, btw) — she ended by saying “Funny story…hear me out.” Whether or not she spilled the whole story wasn’t really clear, though. TBD, apparently.

  8. Kimber on February 13th, 2009 8:34 pm

    I figured that Jennifer figured Kenneth was too “ugly” for her. Not that he is, you know, but it seems that when she got to his chin (or lack there-of) she got all weird, compared it to herself, and made her exit. Poor Kenneth. Tracy’s “Kenneth impressions” had me in fits of giggles.

    I also YAY’d at the Mandy Patinkin reference, although for me it was a call back to great shows like Dead Like Me, and his time with Criminal Minds.

  9. Mandy on February 13th, 2009 9:52 pm

    I think the girl who played Jennifer also played Jack McBrayer’s wife in Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I might be wrong though.

    I’m not a huge fan of 30 Rock, but this episode made me laugh. I loved the shout out at the church to all the pregnant women and Jack’s comment. I can’t remember it now, but it made me laugh.

    Also Liz on the toilet on me in stitches. I hope Don Draper aka Jon Hamm sticks around for a bit longer.

  10. kari on February 14th, 2009 12:03 am

    Good call, Mandy! Maria Thayer did play the wife in FSM; guess I need to watch that again.

  11. Lisa (aka lmr) on February 14th, 2009 10:15 am

    My absolute favorite moment was the phone call to the cadence of
    The Lord’s Prayer – that was pure writing genius, blasphemous a bit, but genius!

    Thanks for the great write-up, Kari.

  12. rivb on February 16th, 2009 12:20 pm

    Good call on the Cyrano storyline. And I love that they referenced Kenneth’s lack of chin. He’s got Cynthia Nixon syndrome.

    This was a great episode. Although, I find it hard to believe that Mr. Cartoon Pilot would be so rational after missing his mother’s (grandmother’s) final moments.

    I’m guessing that Liz will eventually have to dump him, as he’s too similar to her. And what happened to her lughead boyfriend who wanted a baby? I think I missed the conclusion of that relationship.

  13. kari on February 16th, 2009 5:50 pm

    I’m not sure which boyfriend wanted the baby — was it Dennis the Beeper King / Subway Hero? She kicked him to the curb last year, because he’s an idiot, but I wish he’d come back. There’s nobody I love more than the Beeper King.